Lifehack for Her
Tell your significant other that you find men holding bouquets in parking lots to be VERY sexy. You may never have to buy flowers again.
Lifehack for Him
She isn’t lying when she says this. Men with flowers ARE very sexy. Let me illustrate. Let’s say this is you, and you are a five out of ten.
This is you in a parking lot with a flower:
This is you in a parking lot with a LOT of flowers:
With a mere $6.99 at your local grocery store, you can raise your score by four whole points. That’s not easy to do. There are other ways: get a job. But, come on, this only takes five minutes and $6.99!
So you say, you have already tricked your significant other into a long-term relationship. She knows you are a five. Why bother? Well, here is the other thing about flowers. They are MAGIC.
Flowers emit Jedi mind control rays into whatever room they are placed. These rays reduce stress by a factor of two. They increase cooperation by a factor of three. However, if you hand flowers to someone, the effect on that person is doubled.
Let’s say you forgot to take the trash out this morning, and you had to stay late at work. This is you coming home:
But this, this is you coming home WITH FLOWERS:
The effects of cut gerber daisies last approximately three to seven days, while the effects of a potted orchid can last over a month. This is without a doubt the best $6.99 you’ll ever spend.